Socrapes.

I was sitting on the toilet today, pondering my existence, when I had a stroke (relax, wait for the rest of the sentence) of genius. Now, independent philosophy is usually pretty banal, since you're asking yourself stuff that bearded men in togas already answered millennia ago. But sometimes, very rarely, you come to your own conclusion, and if it's at all original, you feel like a fucking wizard. So, here's the conclusion I came to, as succinctly as possible:

God is merely the commissioner; we are the artists.

Think about it. Come on, that has to be the best mid-dump epiphany since Hank Schrader realized who Heisenberg was. If I die, I want that put into a book of quotes, with my name on it. If you're reading this and I'm dead, make it happen or I'll haunt the shit out of you. I've seen Ghost, I know how to annoy people through the ether.